First Lines: It was the best of 'lines,' it was the worst of 'lines'.

When you first meet someone, or even less than meet --encounter-- a stranger, what do they tell you?

Sure the first words are usually, "Hi!" or "Hello" or if it is customer service, "May I help you?" Although I find less and less that customer service has anything to do with helping me and more about helping the service they represent, but that's another story.

Driving home today along our quiet little residential street, I 'encountered' a man on a bicycle. What did he tell me? Without an opportunity for conversation -- me in my van, he on his bicycle -- he told me quite a bit. I recognized him as a neighbor who seemed to have few boundaries. This was the man who decided to comandeer my garbarge bin, fill it with his own assorted cans of paint and other disallowed hazardous materials and set it out to the curb in front of MY house. Luckily we caught his duplicity and unloaded the contraband near his own trash can. My tight smile as greeting today probably told him that I hadn't forgotten the incident. The fact that I waved (half heartedly) and he acknowledged it and me with a nod, tells me that we are not enemies -- yet.

His shiny silver metalic sweat suit told me that he was attempting (again) to lose weight and his dark locks (not a  gray hair in sight) gave me the idea that perhaps there was a new 'love' in his life or someone he wished to 'love.' His ear buds and the dangling wires told that he was not in the mood for conversation with anyone.

The opening line of a book should be as informative as a brief encounter. It should invite you to want to know more, unlike my neighbor. Often the first line introduces something you have in common, or a common event. People you meet at an accident often establish a bond immediately. Or standing in a checkout line and you overhear a conversation that has you itching to join in. Or you see a couple in a doctor's office and read by their body language just how serious the visit is and you feel their pain.

At the least, the novel's opening should prepare the reader for what is to come.

Finding the right opening line is alot like Goldilocks and the Three Bears. One may be too big, too small, or just right. In the book "Tom Sawyer in Hell" by Peter Black he writes: "I had it made."

Too short. Do you really care why he thinks he had it made? After the second sentence do you feel invited in or are you already tossing the book aside? "I graduated from a competitve science/math high school, aced the PSATs, SATs, and had an A- cumulative average." What may possibly make you read further is the strange title of "Tom Sawyer in Hell." Yet that opening does not sound like any Tom Sawyer Mark Twain ever knew.

But then, you might argue, short can work. The shortest line of scripture springs to mind: "Jesus wept." Yeah, even if it is Jessica or Morris or Satan who wept, I want to know why, what caused the tears, what's the story?

In Roslyn Paterson's novel "Overtures" she writes: "Fiona walked out of the bustling train station in West Berlin and scanned around her for the signs directing her to Checkpoint Charlie, the portal into another world, and another time, which was Communist East Germany."

Too long. She gives us information. Who, what, where, and maybe a little glimpse of 'time travel.'  But does it invite you in? She also demonstrated that she could use another edit for tighter writing. The setting is somewhat intriguing. The second line tells a rather mundane description of her holding her passport and standing in line. I'm not curious, are you? And yes, yes, too long can work. So why isn't this one working?

What about: "I am old now and have not much to fear from the anger of gods."

Ahhhhh. Just right. I want to read the next line. It is a negative. Writing instructors include in their long lists of dos and don'ts that one should not write in the negative. It is harder to understand. The author must have missed class that day.

"I have no husband nor child, nor hardly a friend, through whom they can hurt me."

I am not one who chooses to read about gods, myths, sorry old women, yet I am almost unwillingly reading on. There's a mystery in these few lines. There is a person who draws me in to hear her story. Have you ever seen a face and immediately thought, "What a life they must have had!" This old woman is giving me that kind of thought. Just let me read another line or two.... But this author is a pretty crafty fisherman. He's setting the hook deeper and deeper. By the second paragraph, I'm hooked and he's reeled me in. "Being, for all these reasons, free from fear, I will write in this book what no one who has happiness would dare to write."

I picked the books at random. The third book is a novel by C.S. Lewis. "Till We Have Faces: A Myth Retold." It is first person, so maybe that makes the opening stronger than Paterson's novel which is third person or omniscent. Yet, Black's book is first person. So point of view doesn't seem to be the point of strength for C.S. Lewis's opening. He's painting a character we may recognize, even relate to, but yet, out of the norm. She has a story I want to hear or at least I think I want to hear more.

What if the first line doesn't introduce a person? What if it goes on for a couple pages, several pages, and doesn't formerly introduce the character. Would you read it? Would it work? Why? Perhaps the place is a character?

First line: "Jail is not as bad as you might imagine."

Do you want to read the second sentence?

I do.

"When I say jail, I don't mean prison."

This requires clarification, so we really must read the third sentence, which leads to the fourth, which leads you to wonder who is telling us this and why and why are they so obsessed about jails? Another good fisherman. The hook is set. This comes from Anna Quindlen's novel, "One True Thing."

When writing for a daily deadline at a newspaper, I found that the part that took the longest was the opening hook. Often we'd write the rest of the article and realize that the last line was actually the first line -- the words that would draw the reader in and cause them to continue reading.

Let me return to Mr. Black's book. Remember the short first sentence he wrote: "I had it made." I flip to the last page (before the Epilogue) and read the last line. "Looking at the river is peaceful, and the reflections on the water are like the reflections on my life." Ehhh well, a little melodramatic and perhaps you've seen that before in some navel gazing overwritten book.

I look over the paragraph and find his opening. This would draw me in. "Nobody wants to help you unless there is someting in it for them."

I want to know how this person came to such a negative outlook and at the same time I realize that I have that same thought surfacing in my own brain now and then. I can identify with the thought and at the same time I am curious as to who this person is. And I really want to hear the story that involves this attitude.

Not only do opening sentences draw in the reader. They set the tone of the book -- not only for the reader, but for the writer. If that first sentence doesn't work, the writer has not found his or her story, yet. Often it takes alot of prewriting, rewriting, screaming and crying, and desperate days to find that first sentence.

Here are a few more firsts for you to decide for yourself whether they work or not:

1.  "Forgive me my denomination and my town; I am a Christian minister, and an American."

[A Month of Sundays, by John Updike] How often do you see a novel begin with an apology?

2.  "Shoot, birthdays, they ain't no big deal."

[Lyin Like a Dog, by R. Harper Mason]

3.  "It happened every year, was almost a ritual."

[The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, by Stieg Larsson]

4.  "The housekeeper is ironing and I am lying on the floor beside her, trying to secretly look up her dress."

[Joy School, by Elizabeth Berg]

Each opening sentence has just enough there to grab you and just enough missing to keep hold of you. And that, I think, is the secret of novel writing -- well, at least writing the first sentence. But remember, by the time you find that perfect first sentence -- you have probably already written the book at least once to find it. Once you've found it, now you can 'rewrite' the book, making it what you were meant to write all along!

NANOWRIMO TIME!!!

Are you joining the mob of writers participating in National Novel Writing Month? I am.

Anything that will encourage me to write, offer me a fixed and immovable deadline and I'm there. I seem to be helpless to move my writing forward alone. I'll be there as wordsogold -- if you want to sign up as my buddy. I need all of the support I can get!

This will be my third year. I finished last year, but it was a chaotic mess. This year, maybe I can get it in order and have an actual manuscript at the end of the month.

What is NANOWRIMO? The website describes themselves as "National Novel Writing Month is a fun, seat-of-your-pants approach to novel writing. Participants begin writing November 1. The goal is to write a 175-page (50,000-word) novel by midnight, November 30."

The only thing that matters is 'output.' Not quality just quantity. It helps free up that self censor and focus on getting that rough draft written.

So, as they have posted on their site, to recap:

So, to recap:


What: Writing one 50,000-word novel from scratch in a month's time.

Who: You! We can't do this unless we have some other people trying it as well. Let's write laughably awful yet lengthy prose together.

Why: The reasons are endless! To actively participate in one of our era's most enchanting art forms! To write without having to obsess over quality. To be able to make obscure references to passages from our novels at parties. To be able to mock real novelists who dawdle on and on, taking far longer than 30 days to produce their work.

When: You can sign up anytime to add your name to the roster and browse the forums. Writing begins November 1. To be added to the official list of winners, you must reach the 50,000-word mark by November 30 at midnight. Once your novel has been verified by our web-based team of robotic word counters, the partying begins.

Still confused? Just visit the How NaNoWriMo Works page!

Facing that first draft

Like all writers when I'm floundering I search for commiseration and advice. Writing fiction seems to be something I can't take seriously.

I adore fiction and want desperately to have a novel with my name on it.... Well, actually I have several with my name on them. I've written my name on the fly leaf of many, many, many. And my name has been included on several back covers along with comments stripped from my reviews of the author's little darling. And in a few my name is included in the acknowledgements -- I'm getting closer! But so far it hasn't appeared on the title page with the word 'by' in front of it!

Today I scoured the Internet for advice. Again and again I encountered: 'Get a Rough Draft Written.'

Why is that such a roadblock for me? I write three or four chapters and then stop dead in my tracks. I've either written myself into a corner or I've run out of ideas or and this is the most often encountered problem for me -- I have several directions to go and I don't know which to take and so I don't go anywhere.

Maybe this stems from my lack of compass and inability to know how to get anywhere or back again. On the road I have GPS and my Tom Tom. What do I use in a novel?

In life I take the path of least resistance. But in a novel, at least from what I've read of published works, easy is boring. Conflict -- now that's the key!

Maybe if I put more conflict in my writing, I'll have less of it in my life! Now, that's a thought.

Another thought, of course, is that November is NANOWRIMO month! Maybe that will be the perfect time for me to get that rough draft hammered out! 

A good friend who has completed one novel and most of a second believes the Marshall Plan is the way to go. It doesn't matter that she hasn't sold the novels, it at least got her to finish them! Or finish a few drafts.

I think Stephen King's book on writing is probably the best I've read as far as motivation and some helpful details as well as the story of his stagger to success. Kind of depressing to think that he wrote a whole book (Cujo) while under the influence of drugs and doesn't even remember writing it. Maybe the key is finding the right drugs -- Nah! Maybe some brownies. Nah! I'd like to remember the process and know that I wrote it -- in my right mind.

So I guess I'm back to Butt in Chair!

Time to get serious or A journey begins with the first step, unless you turn around and don't take the second

(Photo by Marion Ettlinger)

I am a writer.

It took me several decades and more than 100 articles published before I could say that without feeling like a fool or even worst like a fraud. For years (decades) I wanted to add the title of novelist to my name. But I have difficulty getting past the feeling of wasted time whenever I venture into my characters' world. And when it doesn't flow for 100,000 words and form itself into a marketable (saleable) product, I stop and lament the wasted time. Yet the feeling never goes away that I MUST write a novel!

What I hear from writers such as Mary Higgins Clark and Joyce Carol Oates and other successful members of the publishing business boils down to: persevere.

These two women especially say how dreadful, how much they hate those first few weeks of a new project. They are angry and anxious and frustrated and totally convinced they cannot write. And then after several weeks. Joyce Carol Oates suggested six weeks. It begins to work and they find their footing and the fog clears from the landscape and they begin to get acquainted with their characters and the story begins to unfold with less fighting and wrestling and fewer tears.

Up to this point I have successfully written 1000 or 2000 words and sold them without difficulty to well respected markets. There are examples of my essays on the sideboard here. But when I begin something longer I get bogged down and give up in confused frustration.

Organization obviously is key in a longer work (how else do we keep characters and scenes straight?) and I'm deficient in that area -- one look at my 'crap room' will send you screaming out of the house. My first and only to date garage sale was a marvel. Buyers would come in and look around and exclaim, "My goodness, this covers three or four decades of fashion, of stuff."

I'm a keeper, and I believe, firmly believe, that I will use everything again one day. And then like Ralph's barn, the layers build up and up and I can't find it when I need it and then nothing gets done. I throw up my hands in frustration and quit.

Ralph's barn, by the way refers to a man who worked construction and would drag home truck loads of leftovers and castoffs from the worksite. He would store everything in his barn. It got so full that you literally walked across the barn on top of boxes of stuff. And whenever he needed something for home repairs or projects, he wouldn't go to the barn. He would mutter, "Its in there somewhere," and then head to the hardware store to purchase whatever he needed. I believe the barn eventually fell down. Although it might have fallen down years earlier if it hadn't had all of that stuff inside holding it up.

My brain is also like Ralph's barn. So many stories swirling around in it. So many characters. So many scenes. And yet I can't seem to find the parts to fit together into something complete and compelling.

But, since only about eight of us read this blog at any given time, I hope you won't mind that I change the direction for the next few months. There will still be synchronicity discussions since it seems to be these kinds of strange comings together that spark my writing. But, for the moment I want to use this venue to help me stay with one project at least through the slogging, frustrating, hair pulling "I'm gonna give up" stage and see if I can actually get to the ahhhh its working state of grace in a novel.

So today I vow that I will begin to act like a professional writer complete with crying fits and self flogging. But I won't give up.

I will attempt to write each day. If it is only to explore characters or do research or figure out the rock structure under the city where my characters reside. I will continue until I have something that resembles a novel. A readable, marketable novel.

Are you with me?

I have listened again and again to Diana Gabaldon's talks about how she began writing Outlander (by the way another book is due out any day!) and she laid down two rules for herself. I've paraphrased them below:

1. Write the best I can.

1A. WRITE!

2. Finish it.

She doesn't write in a linear fashion. She writes whatever scene comes to her. I believe that is a style that will work for me and I want to give it a try. So if I post anything here please know that it may not be in order of how it would appear in the book. And I will be working on more than one project because I keep running into stone walls and can't seem to find my way around them, but in an effort to keep writing, I'll start or continue on another project.

Here's a piece of what was fresh in my brain a week or so ago before I hit a wall. I eked out almost 3000 words and then nothing.

Working Title: Chalk Lady

Simultaneously, with as much force as she could muster, she brought the side of her fist down on the toes peeking out of the strappy white sandals while turning her head to spit on the exposed ankles above the Birkenstocks. The two women screamed and jumped back. Their attacker resumed her work without any lingering malice, repairing the damage the gawkers had done.

Slowly, thoughtfully she replaced a cylinder of chalk onto the battered metal tray. Her hand hovered above the dusty yet colorful array before choosing a subdued sage green and applying the color to what gawkers like the sandal wearers realized was a face – a haggard, careworn, devastating visage that made their hearts hurt just to see the pain in the eyes. It was a female figure. Beyond the gnarled fingers, straggling hair, fierce eyebrows and burning eyes, one could see a hint of a gentle curve and female nature. A reminder of breasts that might have once been voluptuous rather than sagging, lips that might once have smiled invitingly. (c) Dawn Goldsmith 2009

For some reason I awoke one morning with the vision of this street artist in my mind and I rushed to the computer to try to capture her in words. She's an elusive figure, this woman, yet I think I know what she's about. Can I accurately represent her and her life and the story she wants me to tell?

And for years I have been friends with a group of characters who inspired the name of my other blog: Subversive Stitchers: Women Armed with Needles. Here is a snippet of what I've written about them. But the story keeps beginning again and again and I can't quite decide which group is the one I want to write about or which setting or which conflict....I think there's a series here.

Working Title: Subversive Stitchers

Knowing something is not nearly as satisfying as sharing it. That was Alma Wright’s motto.

She peered through the twisted metal Art Nouveau grillwork. It separated her workspace from the tiny post office lobby. She looked out onto the government green walls and scarred black and green linoleum floor. She could also keep an eye on the bank of copper antique doors that secured each mailbox for citizens of Clarion, Ohio. Being postmistress not only gave her keys to the back room of the post office, but also opened up access to everyone’s business. She was the first to read their picture post cards, the first to know when a bill was overdue and the first to see who was corresponding with whom. Email had curtailed much of the personal letter information, but in a small town there was always gossip and she was well connected on the grapevine. Her whole world had shrunk to the size of the tiny post office. (c)Dawn Goldsmith 2008

I welcome comments and encouragement, prayers and lit candles. And I WELCOME ways to get my writing organized so I can easily find what I need and finish this project and begin a whole new chapter in my life. And if you wish to discuss the fiction I'm writing, even better!

Five things to improve the new year

The year has dawned anew and here we are with all of this possibility before us. Twelve months to use or waste. So in an effort to make the best use of this time I have attempted to get started off on the right foot.

1. I don't think I laugh enough. So I'm including as many books and authors in my reading list who make me laugh. Two such authors are Mark Schweizer (The Alto Wore Tweed, The Baritone Wore Chiffon, etc.) and Steven Hockensmith (Holmes on the Range mystery series).

2. I think I spend too much time answering emails. I have suspended memberships in online writing groups so that I might spend more of my time practicing the art of writing, rather than learning about it. I have so many things I have learned, now it is time to give it a try. This is the year I complete the novel and send it off for good or ill to hopefully be published.

3. My world is too small. I need to explore more. I haven't quite figured out how I will do this, but maybe I'll begin with small steps -- check out the new coffee house down the street or make sure I have at least one day a week (or a month) where I do something new or different or use a different perspective. To that end, I hope to use my camera more. A camera has a way of capturing truths we otherwise miss. And hopefully photos will remind me of special things and I can translate them into words.

4. I need to get connected. When we have an emergency, I have no strategy or back up or contact person. It is time to build my network and find my community where I am at, not just long for the community so far away.

5. I would like to live more in tune with the words of Max Ehrmann (1927) as he wrote in his Desiderata:

• Go placidly amid the noise and haste and remember what peace there may be in silence.
• As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons.
  
• Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others; even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story.
  
• Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexatious to the spirit.
• If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
  
• Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
  
• Keep interested in your own career however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
  
• Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism
• Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.
  
• Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
  
• Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
• Do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
  
• Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.
  
• You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
  
• Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
  
• With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.
  
• Be cheerful.
  
• Strive to be happy.

I wish you all a happy and healthy and blessed New Year!

Novel writing in November

Chris Baty and twenty friends from the San Francisco Bay area had an idea that would help them write their novels and actually enjoy the process. They set a month aside to write their novels. Just write, no editing, no worry about content so much as number of words. 50,000 words in 30 days became the mantra and the goal.

That was in 1999. Today on the first day of nanowrimo: National Novel Writing Month -- 139,000 visits were logged on to the site.

The popularity of this project has risen exponentially with each successive year. The first year, July, 1999, 21 people gathered in the San Francisco Bay area and competed. Year two saw an increase to 140 participants, a world wide web site and the need for rules and regulations. The competition was moved to November to best use the crappy weather situation in San Francisco. If there really is crappy weather in SF? Chris Baty, nanowrimo originator, expected 150 people the next year, but 5,000 showed up. At the end of this hellish year for the site managers, Baty requested some contributions.

Here's what he wrote about that experience.

This was the start of my education in running an event without a mandatory entry fee. The biggest lesson of which is this: When you make contributions voluntary, very few people volunteer to contribute. No matter how great a time they had or how much they believe in your cause, 90% of participants just won't find their way to clicking on the PayPal link or mailing in a couple dollars.

The karmic repercussions of it all were mind-boggling to me. Who were these monsters? I'd spent the last month staying up till 3 am every night patiently answering emails, offering encouragement, and giving up every ounce of love and support that the Red Bull hadn't leached from my body. And when I asked for one dollar in return, they turned a cold shoulder? Was this the definition of community?

I spent a week or so frozen in that bitter, martyred pose until a public radio fundraising drive brought me out of it. The baritone-voiced radio announcer was trying to interest me in yet another Newsweek-filled pledge package, and I was looking around to find something to throw at the stereo. Which was when I realized what was happening.

My god, I thought. I suckle at the teat of public radio all year, and I have never once sent them a dime. Never. And how often had I ever given anything to charities or organizations I believed in?

By 2002, nanowrimo had a fully automated site and Chris and cohorts no longer pulled all nighters trying to keep up. The cult of nanowrimo lasts all year and there are regional groups and activities organized to maintain interest in the project.

One of the early years, I logged on and quickly fell behind in the project, never reaching the 50,000 word goal. Today I seem to be more driven to finish at least one book before I die. Having lived past the half century mark, thoughts of death have surpassed thoughts of liposuction. I'm beginning to feel comfortable with love handles and thunder thighs. But still, I want to finish that novel.

So I'm signed up once again for the 50,000 words in 30 days goal. I'm happy to say I have surpassed the 1/5th mark and am headed around the bend toward 20,000 words -- all on the same topic so it is conceivable that these words could be formed into a reasonable facsimile of a novel. I hope, I hope.

And I owe it to Diana Gabaldon who intrigues me with her writing and the faceless daisypappa person on nanowrimo's historic fiction forum who put it all in perspective with her comment:

I think you're being too hard on yourself. Holding up Gabaldon as the standard is just too much pressure. Write from your heart.

So to all of the nanowrimo contestants I wish a hearty GOOOD LUCK! Keep writing. You can do it. And to Chris Baty. Just look what you've started! Congratulations. But Chris, did you ever write or publish your novel?

Where's Your Bookmark?

It's a frequently asked question on the DorothyL list. "Where's Your Bookmark?" This group brought together by mystery -- writing that is. Booklovers, authors, readers, reviewers, we all like to talk books, primarily mystery books. Seems like in most books, there is an element of mystery, even in the badly written ones -- the mystery there is how did they ever get published? It is a great place to chat with your favorite mystery authors, too.

The latest mystery I read was by Judy Clemens "The Day Will Come" and the review, if you're interested, is in the November issues of Mystery Scene Magazine. I've also read a few non-mystery genres. A nonfiction that's been out for a few years written by Erik Larson: "The Devil in the White City."

And in the spirit of working toward writing and publishing my own novel, I am reading everything I can get my hands on about the Gilded Age, thinking that might make a great time to set a book that I could actually write. I'm no Diana Gabaldon, though. Where she can find pages and pages of information to impart, I can only eek out a couple of sentences, so I need to fill my reservoir of facts while putting pen to paper.

Not surprising perhaps, my bookmark is back in "The Outlander" by Diana Gabaldon. The fact that I am rereading a book, especially rereading it within the same year, within six months of having read it the first time, is extraordinary. There are so many books and so little time that rereading something just seems sacrilegious.

But I am so drawn to her characters, setting, storytelling. I began reading with the intent to study her methods, figure out her style, hunt down the clues that make her writing so addictive, I mean, delightful. I'm a writer hoping, praying, wishing and actually working toward publishing my own novel, so I thought it wise to study an author whose work makes me green with envy. I mean whose work I respect.

Wikipedia says this about Gabaldon: Diana Jean Gabaldon Watkins (b. January 11, 1952 in Arizona) is an American author of Mexican-American and English ancestry. Diana Gabaldon is her maiden name, and the one she uses professionally. Her books are difficult to classify by genre, since they contain elements of romantic fiction, historical fiction, and science fiction (in the form of time travel). Her books have so far been sold in 23 countries, and translated into 19 languages besides English.

Yep, that's who I want to be when I grow up!

I managed to get through the first sentence of "Outlander" with an eye toward technique. "Good hook," I mumbled. She set up the coming pages, the coming chapters with one sentence: "It wasn't a very likely place for disappearances, at least at first glance."

Rereading it here, I see that it could be leaner, tighter, more active. Maybe "Looking around, who would have believed this a good place to disappear?" Begin with a question that she will answer. But, that first sentence is about all I remember as far as style or technique or how she fills those pages. Instead, I stepped through the pages and did a little time travel of my own right into the midst of her book. She brought me there at the speed of thought.

How does she do that?